Like many women of a certain age, as I get older, I am becoming a little more introspective and trying to find a more meaningful life. I have always been pretty good at articulating what I don't believe in, but had never really put into words the things I do believe. But am not one to believe a list of "What we believe" beliefs, and so mine are a mishmash of so many things. But the core of it all is, I believe them. I have thought of them over time, but then I, along with 5 million other people, read Elizabeth Gilbert's book "Eat, Pray, Love" and it stuck such a cord, deep within me, as it did with so many other people. After I read it and was so moved by it, I started to think about my beliefs. There were certain things I knew and sort of took for granted that I believed them and others, I fought tooth and nail, not wanting to participate in the judeo-christian model of religion. The feminist in me.
Anyway, so this blog is my diary about my spiritual explorations and thoughts spurred by those. I am trying to document the gathering of my own personal spiritual path. You can call it religion or not. I choose not. I occasionally use certain terms, simply because that is what I am compelled to use, no matter how much I have fought using them. By this I mean the word God. I fight it so much, because it smacks of the patriarchal Deity, and big daddy, and I rebel against that very strongly. But when I am quiet and pray, God is what comes out of my mouth, and so I have stopped fighting it. Later I will explain my concept of that entity.
I also consider my creativity to be a spiritual pursuit, and a way of helping me get in tough with myself. SO there will be the occasional sharing of those things too, but not too often, because I am an enthusiastic artist, but not a particularly good one. I am big fan of really bright paint! But in many ways that is also a spiritual thing. Bright happy colors make me happy. Making a big happy picture makes me happy.
I have no spouse, boyfriend ( I originally typed boy fiend, which is sort of how I view them right now) or children and am alone, but very happily so. This affords me the opportunity to explore much of this in a fairly selfish way, as I need not worry about other household members' feelings. So, if you might think "but what happens to her family when she does these things??" nothing. I have family close by, but no family or anything else living with me.
So I would love some company on this journey. Hop on board if you feel like it. Or not. I am looking forward to the trip.
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